A client has just asked to move a maintenance window to some
other time due to a sudden emergency. The in-house Project
Managers, being the customer-service oriented people that they
are, have just asked if it is possible to move the window to
something less likely to get in the way. You are staring at the
reply screen to the email.
Scene
A few people clustered around a
table. The Herald of
Duty has just departed, having delivered the demand that
a decision needs to be made. A gavel sounds.
Bleeding Heart: Really? Well
then. We'll move it.
Grumpasarus: For ******
sake, we had contractual a maint-en-ance win-dow for a ******
reason! ******, we took a quarter of what we COULD have! Tell 'em to
***** off and lump it. They were warned!
Schemer: Yeah, really. We
told them four weeks ago and now it's a problem?
Slacker: Dude, I planned my
day around that. Moving the work totally ruins my schedule
Voice of Reason: Well, it's a problem they have now
and didn't know about then.
BH: Think about it! They
don't know their emergencies four weeks in advance. It's not fair to
them to have a problem only to have us unavailable. We owe it to
them, it's the humane thing to do.
Grumpasarus: So ****** what?
Not OUR problem.
Schemer: You know....
if we play our cards right we just might get a special gift from the
client. Hm.
Grumpasarus: Who ******
cares?? It'll just go to the PM's not us.
VoR: I point out that the
PMs have been known to be effusive in their praise when we do
favors.
Slacker: But moving the
window means I'll lose
sleep.
It no workie for me.
Schemer: You know, if we
push back a little now and
then
give in, the chances of something special coming our way get higher.
Grumpasarus: Really? Like
what?
Schemer: Clients have been
known to send us things like large boxes of chocolate, cases of
beer, or comps to swank restaurants.
Grumpasarus: Looks thoughtful.
Slacker: DUUUUUDE! Loss. Of.
Sleep. Hello!
VoR: You can take a nap
later.
Slacker: But I was going to
play Skyrim all day, if I nap I won't get as much!
Schemer: Did I mention the
Chocolate?
Slacker: But that's like, work and stuff. No, dude.
VoR: You'll nap less than
the sleep you lost, so you'll actually get more Skyrim in.
Slacker: ... good point.
Schemer: Looks to the awaiting Page, We
have come to a decision! We will push...
BH: Wait! This is the wrong
course of action. You have to work with these people, and pushing
back now will make you seem like you're hard to work with.
Schemer: And that means they
have to buy me off. I don't see the problem with this.
BH: Then they won't tell
you things.
VoR: And when they don't
tell you things, you get cut out of decision loops.
Grumpasarus: For ****** sake
just tell them to ****** lump it already. Or deliver the ******
chocolate. It's not like this'll get done without us.
Slacker: But that's, like,
conflict and stuff. I don't like that.
Grumpasarus: ****** ******
you too? *******! Grow a ****** backbone!
Slacker: Not my job, man.
BH: Going along with this
now will make us look reasonable, and willing to work around our
customer's needs. Be a team player.
Grumpasarus: ****** team
player. We ****** told them ****** four weeks ago that we'd ******
take the ****** system down. They can ****** well bend over and take
it. We notified them! This window is in the ****** contract they
****** signed and ****** well didn't read.
VoR: I remind you again.
When the notice for this outage went out, they didn't know about
this problem. And secondly, the contracted window is much larger
than the one we gave.
Schemer: I still say we
should push back a little. This is last minute, there should be some
costs.
Grumpasarus: ****** right
there should be!
BH: Pushing back makes us
look hard to work with.
Schemer: I really have to
council against blithely rolling over on this one. We don't want to
get to a spot where others can dictate our schedule. It'll mean
dark-of-night for everything.
Slacker: I hate that!
Schemer: I know. And as
we're East Coast and have West Coast clients, it'll mean morning
outages not late-night ones.
Slacker: Duuuuude. No.
Schemer: I know. They do
need to be made aware that this is not a trivial sacrifice on our
part.
Slacker: Sleeeeeep! Skyrim!
BH: They already are aware.
Look at the email. See? They know.
Grumpasarus: That's just
****** 'customer service' weasel-words.
Schemer: Hm, I'm not so
sure. That sentence could go either way. I'm willing to be persuaded
this once and see how it goes.
VoR: Fred has usually played
straight with us in the past.
Grumpasarus: You're *****
serious??
VoR: Yes. Always.
Slacker: No. Uh uh. We gotta
push a little. Make 'em think twice before asking to totally blow
our schedule.
Grumpasarus: Better! Tell
them to ****** off!
Schemer: No, we can still
make some hay with this. Push a little, not a lot. Just enough.
BH: I really wish we didn't
have to push back.
Grumpasarus: We don't ******
have to. We just tell them ****** no. No pushing, just ******
standing our ****** ground.
Slacker: I, uh, don't want
to say no outright. It'll get us in trouble later. So kinda no?
Grumpasarus: For ******
sake, grow a ****** backbone you ****** lazy ****** ****** ******. *****
this.
Stomps off in a huff.
BH: Points at the retreating Grumpasarus.
That's an abstention!
VoR: I agree.
Slacker: Turns to waiting page, We have
a decision....
To: Fred Gerkin
Subject: RE Pushing the maintenance window
Hi Fred,
We warned 'em, but I do
understand emergencies. I had plans, but I'm pretty sure I can get
them moved. The new window will be 4 to 7am. I'll let you know if
I can't flex my plans.